Getting my kids involved made decluttering their rooms easier. We got rid of 44 bags of stuff, and they felt heard.

The author (not pictured) says that letting kids set the tone makes it easier to declutter.

With four creative children ranging in age from 8 to 18, life comes with a fair amount of clutter.

I’ve been teaching my kids to declutter for years, but usually in small bursts — one shelf or closet at a time. This year, we decided to do a deep declutter as part of a “live with less” challenge.

They all helped, and we got rid of 44 bags of stuff. Here’s how we did it.

Our goal was not perfection

The kids were surprisingly keen. They wanted to make their individual spaces feel more grown-up. We didn’t aim for Pinterest perfection; our goal was to create spaces where they felt comfortable and happy.

I attack clutter the way Andrew Mellen describes in his book “Unstuff Your Life.” You remove every item from the room you’re decluttering except for larger pieces of furniture, like beds. This meant we had to do it one room at a time. My 12-year-old stepson volunteered to go first. He’d never done a full declutter before, but he was into it from the start.

The “emptying out” step is slow, but it pays off. As my stepson and I carted stuff back and forth from his room to the lounge, watching the floor space fill up, he was faced with how much he owned. It’s a powerful visual for kids to see every single item laid out.

Once his bedroom was empty, we vacuumed and wiped things down. Then, I asked my stepson to choose his favorite things and display them on his bedside cabinet.

I let them set the tone

Sometimes, children get worried you’ll make them throw away things they like. By placing special things on display first, you show them you value their stuff and set the tone for them to lead the decluttering.

Then, we set up two bags — one for rubbish and one for donations. Often, you need a “memories” box as well to put away things they want to keep but no longer need to be accessible. With those boxes ready, we were all set to start the repetitive process of picking up every single item and asking, “Keep or not?”

I try to let the kids make their own decisions as much as possible. I’m just there for support.

Three hours later, he’d removed six full bags of stuff, and we were ready to put the rest back. His dad taught him how to put up a shelf where he created a “museum” with his favorite model cars, and we switched out his Spider-Man duvet cover for a more grown-up one. It took four hours total, but my stepson had a room he was happy with.

For my 14-year-old, both her room and her art space needed a cleanout. In the end, the art space took two days, and 12 bags were donated or thrown out. We couldn’t believe it had all fit in there. With far less stuff, she was able to create a cozy, organized space where she could go to do her art and have some peace and quiet.

Once the kids’ bedrooms, art space, (and the adults’ closet) were all done, we removed a whopping 44 bags of trash and donations.

Decluttering with kids isn’t easy, but it can be a positive way to spend one-on-one time together with them.

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