I’m a mom of 3 and struggled to keep my kids off screens. 4 strategies have helped get them outside more.

The author set four rules for her children to reduce their screen time. 

I’ll admit it: I have a hard time managing my kids’ screen use. As a mom of three boys I noticed that I was relying a lot on screens.

When I think back to my childhood, before the cellphone and iPad era, I spent time playing outside and getting creative with things around the house, like a cardboard box.

I look back on how I got here, struggling with my kids’ use of smartphones, tablets, video games, computers, and TVs. Over time, the technology creep has taken over.

Using screens became an easy fix

When my oldest was little, I bought him an iPad for a long airplane flight. I thought, “How great is this?” He could sit on a plane quietly and not bother others sitting nearby. He played on educational apps and watched educational shows.

Eventually, we also started bringing iPads to restaurants, on car rides, and other places where they needed to sit for long periods.

Screen usage became an easy fix with the kids.

If the kids were fighting, they used an iPad to calm down. If they did something good, they got a new app as a reward.

Before we knew it, screens were taking over our lives. One son made a $300 purchase on a video game without our knowledge with just one click. Another son woke up at 3 a.m. to watch YouTube videos.

Their behavior started to change

If the kids were on screens too long, they became agitated. They couldn’t sit still or tolerate being bored. They were having difficulty handling their emotions

I reached my breaking point. After trial and error, I implemented these four ground rules that have improved our lives and well-being.

  1. Use apps that control their access and time limits: This has been a lifesaver for us. The kids have a set amount of screen time, their apps and browsing capability are locked down, and I get a daily report of their activity.
  2. Create dedicated no-screen days and times each week: After the initial “But mom!” response, the kids now appreciate no-screen days. They are still surprised when they realize they can have so much fun without screens.
  3. Set an example with your own screen usage: This was a hard habit for me to break. When I realized that I was yelling at my kids to get off the screens when I was glued to my own phone, I knew I had to make some big changes myself.
  4. Offer fun alternatives: We create more time for active fun. We ride bikes, build Legos, go for walks, play outside, and have more adventures.

Technology is not going away

Since these rules have been implemented, we are happier as a family, the kids are better adjusted, and I’ve become more connected with the kids.

For better or worse, our children have become guinea pigs for the effects of technology. There is still so much that needs to be figured out, and there is no rule book.

Technology is not going away. We need to find a way to use it that helps our lives and not hinders them.

As parents, we communicate clear guidelines and model the behavior we hope they implement. I’m sure I’ll continue to mess up along the way, but I am grateful for our technology reset and have seen big improvements.

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